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Koala jokes 🐨 in 2025

How does a koala get from one place to another?
– On a gondkoala

What do you call a lazy koala?
– A pouch potato.

What do koalas eat after a nuclear winter?
– Apocalyptus

A koala goes to a brothel
– So a koala goes to a brothel and does the deed with the prostitute. When they are finished, he gets up and starts to head out the door. The prostitute stops him and says “Hey! The definition of prostitute is we have sex for money!” The koala looks at her and says, “Well the definition of koala is eats bushes and leaves.”

What do Cuban Koala bears eat?
– Yucalyptus

What exercise equipment does a koala use?
– A eucalyptical.

How do koalas get fit?
– They do bearobics.

What do Cuban Koala bears eat?
– Yucalyptus

What do you call a koala that drives?
– A koalafied driver! *badum-tis*

Today I learnt koala bears aren’t actual bears. They’re marsupials.
– I guess they don’t meet the koalafications.

What is a koala’s favorite Christmas carol?
– Deck the halls with baughs of holly, koalalalalalalalala.

What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing?
– “Joey to the World”, of course!

Why did the male koala invite the female koala over to his bamboo.
– He wanted to have a treesome.

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree?
– It was dead.

What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it?
– Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

What do you get if you cross a koala bear with an alien?
– Mars-upial.

A koala is in a job interview
– The interviewer asks the koala “what makes you think you are suitable for this job role?”.

“I have all of the necessary koalifications”.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
– It was dead.

Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
It was stapled to the first koala.

Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
I didn’t want it to get lonely so I shot it.

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