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It’s So Cold Jokes 🥶 in 2025

It’s so cold…
-Harvey Weinstein is keeping his hands to himself.

It’s so cold outside…
-I brushed against a car in the parking lot and accidently keyed it with my nipple.

Why is the letter B so cold?
-Because it’s between the AC.

It was so cold…
-every kind of cereal in the cupboard was frosted – including the boxes!

It was so cold . . .
-we had to chop up the piano for firewood – but we only got two chords.

It was so cold . . .
-we had to carry around hammers and chisels so we could get out of our parkas!

It was so cold . . .
-the rats were bribing the alley cats for a snuggle.

It was so cold . . .
-terrorists started to stockpile weapons-grade hot chocolate!

It was so cold back last winter,
-Starbucks started serving coffee on a stick.

It was so cold…
-hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!

It’ so cold
-I’m shivering like a mobster in a tax office.

It is so cold outside
-that even Ice Cube doesn’t want to go grocery shopping!

It was so cold…
– the doctor thought I had shotgun wounds – until I told him I’d just been standing in front of Dad when he sneezed and blew the shards of ice off his moustache.

It is so cold . . .
-people with traffic tickets would plead guilty and beg for the electric chair!

It was so cold…
-I needed a hammer and chisel to get at the little pockets of brown sugar down in my porridge.

It was so cold . . .
-the optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses!

It’s so cold today,
-I would like you to know this cold weather is snow much fun.

What do you call the friendly ghost during the cold weather?
-You get to call him Cas-brrrrrr!

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