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Hunting jokes in 2024

What do you call a smart blonde?
– A golden retriever

What was the cost of hunting at the zoo?
– Couple bucks.

Why was the hunter not allowed in the car showroom?
– Because he would turn it into a car-pet.

What went wrong with the ghost hunters?
– Nothing, they were pair-o-normal investigators.

One day, while hunting, a kid asked his father what the name of the deer that lost both of his eyes was?
– The father replied, “Sorry, I have no I-deer.”

How did the hunter bake the cookies?
– With chocolate doe.

How did the angel turkey react when he saw the angel hunter came upon him?
– The turkey said. “Quack! Quack! We need to reach safe heaven as soon as possible.”

Why would hunting mushrooms be unethical?
– It would harm one’s morels.

An engineer, a carpenter, and a statistian go deer hunting
– As they wait in their blind a big buck walks up. The engineer stands up, takes a shot, and misses. “Darn,” he says, “two yards to the left.”

– The carpenter takes a shot and misses. “darn, two yards to the right,” he says.

– The statistician jumps up and yells “YES! We got him!”

A man walks into a hunting store and asks if they have the best camouflage clothing.
– The store owner goes looking for it for several minutes but finally comes back to the man and says :
– “Sorry, but I just couldn’t find them”
– The man then leaves the store satisfied.

What did the deer tell the hunter?
– Buck Off!

I was hunting in the woods when I got chased by a grizzly
– I bearly made it out alive

What is the favorite tool of an overconfident hunter?
– He hunts with his bear hands.

What’s the cheapest type of meat?
– Dear balls, they’re under a buck.

What do you call a deer who has lost both eyes in a hunting accident?
– No eye deer

What did the hunter receive on his birthday?
– A birthday pheasant.

What is a hunters favorite game?
– Duck Duck Goose.

What did the deer with the gloves say to the hunter?
– He said, ” I will fight with you with my bear hands.”

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