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History jokes 📜 in 2025

After having learned the history of chess,
– I have come to the conclusion that all chess players have quite a checkered past.

My least favorite teacher in the school is the History teacher.
– Whenever she takes a class on Ancient History, she tends to Babylon.

If you want to be good at making Greek pottery, you have to urn it.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
– The Pilgrims!

When the love of his life finally left him, young Fidel cried out in despair,
– “I didn’t think you would embar go my dear one.”

Henry VIII had breathing troubles – he had no heir!

“Why should the number 288 never be mentioned in company?
– Because it is two gross.”

Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
– It was too far to swim!

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but what do two Wrights make?
– An aeroplane!

The comedian said a joke from the 17th century, the crowd went historical.

When I wrote the history of cheese for our term paper in school,
– our History teacher said it was grate.

Q: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
– A: At the bottom!

What do you call a Medieval knight who’s always sure of himself?
– Sir Tainly!

You do not want to know the history behind the railroad
– because it is so underground.

The biggest irony in the world’s history is that the Russian alphabet has no letters in lowercase.
– It is all Capitalization.

“We must all hang together or assuredly we shall all hang separately.”

What was the most popular kids’ movie in Ancient Greece?
– Troy Story!

What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
– They both lived in colonies!

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