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Gardening jokes 👨‍🌾🌳✂️🌱 in 2025

I have a bird feeder in the garden
– It also works as a cat feeder

I used to be terrified of gardening
– Then I grew a pear

What did the lettuce tell to the celery?
– Stop stalking me.

How much room should you give to fungi to grow?
– As mush-room as possible.

“What does the letter “A” have in common with a flower?
– They both have bees coming after them.”

What kind of astrology do gardeners believe in?
– Plum-is-tree.

What does the gardener do when Spring arrives?
– They wet their plants.

How do flowers handle sadness?
– They get clover it.

What does a nosey pepper do?
– It would get into the jalapeno business.

Why do potatoes make good detectives?
– Because they keep their eyes peeled.

Did you hear about the gardener who went crazy?
– He was hearing voices in his shed

What do you get if you cross a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?
– A rash of good luck.

What can you possibly make from baked beans and onions?
– Tear gas.

How does a flower whistle?
– Using their tulips.

Why did the horse go behind the tree?
– To change his jockeys.

Why is The Hulk considered a very good gardener?
– Because he has got green fingers.

Where do farmers send their kids to study?
– Kinder-garden.

What would you get if you cross a dog with a vegetable?
– A broc-collie!

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