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Fitness jokes 💪🏋️ in 2024

Have you heard about that new gym that sends trainers to your door unannounced?
– It’s called Jehovah’s Fitness.

Of course I have a 6 pack! It’s so great I’m using this beer belly to protect it.

What did the religious zealots call their gym?
– Jehovah’s Fitness

Did you hear about the pumpkins that went to the gym?
– They wanted to become jacked-o-lanterns.

I’ve found running is a great way to meet new people.
– Unfortunately, they’re normally paramedics.

Why some couples don’t go to gym?
– Because some relationship don’t workout.

It was a real pain canceling my gym membership.
– They made me hand in a too weak notice.

I asked a personal trainer “Do you need to eat chicken to get muscles?”
– He said “No whey!”

If you run in front of a car you might get tired, but if you run behind a car you’ll get exhausted!

I just quit my job at the gym because I wasn’t big or strong enough
– I’ve handed in my too weak notice

I started going to the new fish gym a few weeks ago
– It has been all hunky dory so far.

I once knocked a guy off his bike…
– I’ve since been banned from that gym.

Why is it a good idea to do your workout in the morning?
– Because you can get it in before your brain wakes up and realizes what it’s doing!

I had to fire my personal trainer.
– I was tired of all the ab use.

I went to the gym to practice my comedy routine but nobody found it funny.
– It was a tough crowd.

Google Plus was the gym of social networking
– We all joined but no one ever used it

A gym junkie is counting loudly in the gym as he does bench presses.
“1! 3! 5! 7! 9!”
– Says another gym-goer, “Do you even lift, bro?”
– To which the gym junkie replied, “Nah, I only lift odd, bro.”

Last time I went to the gym I hopped on the treadmill, but people were looking at me funny so I decided to run instead.

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