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Engineering Jokes 👷 in 2025

What did the sound engineer say on his last day of work?
-Audios

If you’re an optimist, the glass Is half full. If you’re a pessimist, it’s half empty.
-If you’re an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

What do you call a rude civil engineer?
-An uncivil engineer.

The engineer installed a motor too powerfull in the moving stairway
-It escalated very quickly.

I asked a train engineer how many times his train had derailed.
-I’m not sure, it’s hard to keep track.”

My mechanic tells me my engine keeps stalling because of excess friction.
-Now I know I’m getting some wear.

Why did the engineer create a robot fish?
-He wanted more e-fish in sea

For Electrical Engineers Only !
-What do they do with logic gates that behave erratically?
They call an XORcist.

Some local engineers took a train for a service
-but the vicar said it was blocking the aisle.

Any engineers here?
-My trans sister is one.

A mathematician, physicist, and engineer are all trying to find the volume of a yellow bouncy ball.
-The mathematician gets his calipers out and measures the diameter, then evaluates the integral.
The physicist fetches a bowl of water, drops the ball in and measures the displacement.
The engineer strolls up with a book in hand, checks for a serial number and looks up the volume in his yellow bouncy ball table.

EVERY TIME I had engineering homework in high school…
-Me: Got some engineering stuff to do.. Dad: (FAR TOO ENTHUSIASTICALLY) I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW YOU LIKED TRAINS!!!!

What did the train engineer say when the electric chair didn’t work on him?
-“I guess I’m just a good conductor”

Why is a robot engineer never lonely?
-Because he’s always making new friends.

Two mechanics were making small talk about what happens when an engine is running but the car is in park.
-You know, just some idle banter.

I put the new engineer in charge of driving the locomotive despite without having lessons on how to drive it…
-I figured he would do well with on the job training. He went off the rails and wrecked. I don’t need to mention about his conduct during the process.

What do they call the electrical engineering freak?
-Wired

Did you hear about the constipated engineer?
-He worked it out with a pencil. It was a natural log.

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