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Dragon Jokes 🐲 in 2025

What is the difference between St George and Santa’s reindeer?
– One slays a dragon, the others are dragging a sleigh.

Why did the dragon hate to fight knights and swordsmen?
-He was tired of tinned food.

What was the dragon doing on the motorway?
-About 30 miles per hour.

How do dragons make vacation plans?
-They don’t – they just wing it.

Why do dwarves hunt dragons in the morning?
-Because the early beard gets the worm

Why do dwarves hunt dragons in the morning?
– Because the early beard gets the wyrm

What did the dragon order at the restaurant?
-Hot wings.

How can you tell how much a dragon weighs?
-Well, they come with scales.

How many dragons does it take to change a light bulb?
-Zero. They don’t have thumbs to change light bulbs, but they’re great at lighting candles.

Have you ever seen a baby dragon eating ice cream?
– It’ll melt your heart.

What’s the most stressful thing about being a dragon?
-Trying to blow out the candles on your birthday cake.

A dragon would never explode.
-But a dino might

What types of stories are dragons famous for?
-Long tales…

What do you get when you cross a dragon with a smelly skunk?
-I have no idea, but please don’t make it angry.

I designed a dungeons and dragons weapon for wizards. It’s a magical melee weapon shaped like a tome that uses intellect for damage instead of strength.
-I call it “Book Club”

What time is it when a dragon sits on your bike?
– Time to get a new bike?

What do you do with a green dragon?
-Wait until it ripens!

What do you call an angry dragon?
-An earthquake.

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