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Dad jokes 👨 in 2025

How does a penguin build its house?
-Igloos it together.

What do you get from a pampered cow?
– Spoiled milk.

What do sprinters eat before a race?
-Nothing, they fast!

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
– Ten tickles.

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
-A carrot!

Dad, did you get a haircut?
-No, I got them all cut!

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
-Great food, no atmosphere!

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
-It was two tired.

How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood tree?
-By its bark.

How does Moses make his coffee?
-Hebrews it.

Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?
-Because if they flew over the bay, we’d call them bagels.

What concert costs just 45 cents?
-50 Cent featuring Nickelback!

How do you make a Kleenex dance?
-Put some boogie in it!

What do you call a poor Santa Claus?
-St. Nickel-less.

Why did the scarecrow win an award?
-Because he was outstanding in his field.

Why do melons have weddings?
-Because they cantaloupe!

I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out.
-The cashier said never mind.

How do you make a Kleenex
-Put a little boogie in it!

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