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Crab jokes ๐Ÿฆ€ in 2025

What does a crab have in common with a Chinese guy who gets run over by a bus?
– They’re both crushed Asians.

Who brings Christmas presents to young crabs?
– Santa Claws!

The truth shell set you free!

What kind of protective headgear does a hermit crab wear?
– A shell-met.

What did the crab police officer say when it pulled over a speeding shrimp?
– โ€œYou have to abide by the claw.โ€

Marylanders: Do you know how to tell the difference between male and female Chesapeake blue crabs ?
– The female will tell you how to eat her.

Why did the crab blush?
– It saw the oceanโ€™s bottom.

I shrimply donโ€™t like shellfish!

The hermit crab refused to go in its shell because it was claw-strophobic!

Where do crabs store their money?
– In the sand bank.

What do you call a crab in self-isolation?
– A hermit crab!

Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
– To a prawn broker!

What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
– It-piers we have a problem!

Whatโ€™s a crabโ€™s favorite part about pizza?
– That crust taste, son!

โ€œDoctor, those pills you gave me are working well but they are making walk like a crabโ€…
– โ€œOh, that itโ€™ll be the side effectsโ€

Why did the crab keep all the seaweed to itself?
– Because it was shellfish!

Why was the crustacean unhappy?
– Because his mum was being really crabby!

A good crab joke is hard to crack!

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