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Cookie Jokes 🍪 in 2024

What do websites and people have in common?

– They both use cookies to improve their performance.

From my 13 yr old son. What do you call a pizza in the shape of a cookie?
– A pizza

Whats thanos’s favorite kind of cookie
– Gingersnap

I ate too much cookie dough and got sick.
– It was an overdoughse.

You’re a chip off the old block (of cookie dough).

When I was 5 years old, I got a coal from Santa.

– The next year I decided to make him pay for it and poisoned his cookies.

– Somehow, he found out and killed my dad.

Why was the cookie sad?
– Because his mom was a wafer so long;)

If you give a mouse a cookie…
– He’s going to ask if he can use it to improve your internet browsing experience.

If I have 10 cookies and you take 5, what do you have?
– A broken hand.

How do you make a gingerbread man’s bed?
– With a cookie sheet.

Tough cookies stick together.

Two cookies in an oven, one cookie turns to the other cookie and says “It’s really hot in here”
– The other cookie screams “ahhh a talking cookie”

My girlfriend and i were contemplating going to the store to buy some cookies
– My girlfriend and i were contemplating going to the store to buy some cookies to have with our coffee and get infected with corona, or to just have coffee by itself.

– In the end we decided to go to the store, because you know… you have to risk it for the biscuit.

All these websites are asking me to accept their cookies.
– But I still haven’t gotten even one of them!

What is Cookie Monster’s favorite band?
– OREO Speedwagon.

A friend and I have decided to open a Chinese cookie business.

– We’re going to make fortunes.

A hostess asks his guest: “How many cookies would you like?”
– “Just one will be enough, thank you.”
– “Oh, come on, you don’t have to be polite.”
– “All right, then give me a cookie you fat cow!”

Cookie Thieves
– They really take the biscuit

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