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Construction jokes 🚧🛠️👷 in 2025

What construction work would dogs do?
– They would usually work on woofs!

Why did it take so long for the construction worker to propose?
– He was building up to it.

I didn’t want to believe my friend was stealing from the road construction site.
– But I went to his house to confront him and all the signs were there.

What does a reptile carpenter in the Jurassic age use for cutting wood?
– He probably used a dino-saw!

What did the chief engineer instruct during the construction of Big Ben?
– He asked workers to work right under the clock.

I didn’t expect much from the movie about construction workers, but it was actually quite riveting.

Did you hear the amazing story about the blind construction worker?
– He picked up a hammer and saw.

Seven construction men are all workings​ at the roadside…
– That’s the joke…

Which band do construction workers love listening to the most?
– They absolutely love ‘The Carpenters’.

What does a construction manager tell his workers?
– He usually tells them to nail the delivery!

My manager asked me for a blueprint so I stuck my hand in blue ink and pressed my palm on his desk.

Easiest way to tell a scientist from a construction worker?
– Have them pronounce unionize.

Why did the constructor shy away from making construction jokes?
– Because the joke still needed some work!

What did the stand-up comic say about his road construction joke?
– He could only lay it for everyone in some time.

What was the most groundbreaking invention?
– It had to be the jackhammer.

I got T-boned by a construction delivery truck the other day.
– It came down like a ton of bricks.

A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.
– The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.

The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.

He walks over to the Russian, and all the concrete mix is stacked up nice and orderly. The boss tells him “great work!” and moves on.

He walks up to the Mexican and sees that al the wood is stacked in a perfect pile, so he says “wonderful job!” and moves on.

He then looks around and sees that the Korean is missing, and supplies are everywhere. Out of nowhere, the Korean jumps out from behind a pile of dirt and yells “SUPPLIES!”

What similarity do you find between a volleyball player and a carpenter?
– Both are equally known for liking hammer spikes!

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