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Computer Jokes 💻 in 2025

What are Russian computers best for?
-ComPutin.

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory.
-Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

Why did the cat sit on the computer?
-To keep an eye on the mouse

Why can’t a computer play tennis?
-server unavailable

A spider crawled on my computer
-Don’t worry, it’s under ctrl

What did the spider do on the computer?
-In the Peasant Park.

A computer walks into a bar
-When the bartender asks how many drinks he wants, the computer holds up three fingers.
“I’ll take 7.”

I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.
-There’s no files on me.

Why was there a bug in the computer?
-Because it was looking for a byte to eat

Salesman: This computer will cut your workload by 50%.
– Office Manager: That’s great, I’ll take two of them.

Why did the spider take a laptop to the beach?
-So it could surf the web

How big do computers like their snacks?
-Byte sized

How do you make a computer say ‘5’?
-You’ll figure it out. It’s Programming Binary 101.

What does a baby computer call his father?
-Data

What type of computer does Ronald McDonald use?
-A big mac

Why was Harry Potter such a good computer programmer?
-Because he spoke python.

Haha
Haha

Why did the computer squeak?
-Because someone stepped on its mouse

A computer once beat me at chess,
– but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

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