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Coding jokes 👨‍💻 in 2025

Every program is either trivial or it contains at least one bug.

From the Random Shack Data Processing Dictionary:

– Endless Loop: n., see Loop, Endless.
– Loop, Endless: n., see Endless Loop.

Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?

– Because DEC 25 = OCT 31

The two most difficult things in programming…
– The two most difficult things in programming are memory management, naming things, and off by one errors.

Have you heard they are developing an Object Oriented version of COBOL?
– It’s called…Bruce

How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?
– Three: One to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
– None–It is a hardware problem.

Why was the programming language afraid when it entered the arena?
– It had enumerable foes.

Give a man a program, frustrate him for a day.
– Teach a man to program, frustrate him for a lifetime.

Thou shalt not document.
– Documentation only comes in handy for making future modifications. You made the software perfect the first time, it will never need modifications.

Programming is like sex:
– One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

There’s no place like 127.0.0.1

I watched so many programming tutorial videos in college
– My inner monologue started developing an Indian accent

A system programmer came home from work almost at dawn and told his wife enthusiastically: “Tonight I have installed a new release of MVS/ESA together with VM/CMS and CICS/VS”.
– “G.O.O.D” answered his wife.

Al-gor-ithm” means “The unscrupulous technique of continuing to count and re-count until you get the result you want.” (Sent by Gary Gilmore)

The three most dangerous things in the world are a programmer with a soldering iron, a hardware engineer with a software patch, and a user with an idea.

How did the programmer die in the shower?

– He read the shampoo bottle instructions: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Here’s a short programming joke: !false
– It’s funny because it’s **true**. I hope that makes you laugh a *bit*.

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