Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Clean jokes in 2024

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.
-That way, when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes.

I got my husband a fridge for his birthday.
-His face lit up when he opened it.

What did the left eye say to the right eye?
-Between you and me, something smells.

Why did the nurse need a red pen at work?
In case she needed to draw blood.

What’s green, has six legs, and if it drops out of a tree onto you will kill you?
-A pool table.

Why did the picture go to prison?
-Because it was framed!

How does a farmer mend his overalls?
-With cabbage patches

Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward.
-That’s just how I roll.

Why did the math textbook visit the guidance counsellor?
-It needed help figuring out its problems.

Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
-The lettuce was “ahead” but the tomato was trying to “catch up.”

What did Mr. and Mrs. Hamburger name their daughter?
-Patty!

Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
-He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.

That’s just how I roll.
-An egg wash!

How do you look for Will Smith in the snow?
-Just follow the fresh prints.

What did the traffic light say to the cars?
-Don’t look, I’m changing!

What do you call a cheese that’s not yours?
-Nacho cheese!

I went in to a pet shop. I said, “Can I buy a goldfish?” The guy said, “Do you want an aquarium?”
-I said, “I don’t care what star sign it is.”

I waited all night to see where the sun would rise…
-…And then it dawned on me.

Follow us on Facebook