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Clean jokes in 2025

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
-Because the “P” is silent!

What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes?
-Re-Morse code.

Why did they stop doing tests at the zoo?
-Because it was full of cheetahs!

What did the nose say to the finger?
-Quit picking on me!

Have you heard about corduroy pillows?
-They’re making headlines.

Where does Batman go to the bathroom?
-The batroom.

Why didn’t the duck pay for the lip balm?
-He wanted to put it on his bill.

couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger.
-Then it hit me.

Why don’t koalas count as bears?
-They don’t have the right koalafications.

What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
-Same middle name.

Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
-Because he lost his filling.

What do you call a fly without wings?
-A walk.

What is the lunchmeat that tastes like hot dogs?
-They say: Bologna?

Want to hear a roof joke?
-The first one’s on the house.

I couldn’t believe that the highway department called my dad a thief.
-But when I got home, all the signs were there.

Rest in peace to boiling water.
-You will be mist.

When is it time to go to the dentist?
-Tooth hurty (2:30)

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.
-That way, when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes.

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