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Christmas jokes 🎄 in 2025

Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
– Because it soot’s him.

What do three ho’s get you?
– One very jolly Santa.

What’s the absolute best Christmas present?
– A broken drum — you can’t beat it!

What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast?
– The One Show!

What does an elf study in school?
– The elf-abet.

What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy?
– Ornamints.

What do you call Santa if he also lives in the South Pole?
– Bi-Polar.

What do you call a broke Santa?
– Saint Nickel-less

What does a grumpy sheep say when his friends told him Merry Christmas?
– Baaaa humbug!

Why does Santa have three gardens?
– So he can ‘ho ho ho’!

The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn’t believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus.

What’s the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa was smart enough to stop at three hos.

What does Santa do when his elves misbehave?
– He gives them the sack!

What kind of photos do elves take?
– Elfies!

What’s the difference between Santa and a knight?
– One slays the dragon, the other drags the sleigh.

What’s the difference between a Christmas tree and a man?
– A Christmas tree will stay up for 12 nights, has cute balls and looks good with the lights on.

What happens if you eat Christmas decorations?
– You get tinsel-it is.

What do reindeers say before they tell you a joke?
– This one’s gonna sleigh you!

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