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Christmas jokes 🎄 in 2025

What did Santa do when he went speed dating?
– He pulled a cracker!

Did you know that Santa’s not allowed to go down chimneys this year?
– It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

Why was the snowman smiling?
– He could see the snowblower coming down the street.

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
– Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Who delivers Christmas presents to elephants?
– Elephanta Claus.

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
– Nothing. It was on the house!

What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?
– Crisp Kringle.

Why does Santa land on the roof?
– Because he likes it on top.

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
– Tinsil-itis!

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
– Claus-trophobia!

Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
– It needed to be trimmed!

Is your name Jingle Bells?
– Cause you look ready to go all the way.

What do Santa’s elves learn in school?
– The elf-abet.

What do you call Santa’s little helpers?
– Subordinate clauses.

What kind of motorcycle does Santa like to ride?
– A Holly Davidson!

What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
– A rebel without a Claus.

What do you call Kris Kringle when he goes on his wife’s health insurance?
– A dependent Claus.

What do priests and Christmas trees have in common?
– Their balls are just ornamental.

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