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Chocolate jokes ๐Ÿซ in 2025

How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies?
– 10….one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms

There are two types of people in this world:
– People who love chocolate and liars.

What happened when the chocolate bar stuck his finger in the plug?
– He became a shock-o-late bar!

Orange-you going to invite me in?

Everyone always says that chocolate is like crack, so one day I actually tried it to find out for myself.
– I still prefer crack.

Life is like a box of chocolatesโ€ฆ
– Mostly disappointing.

What do you get when you cross a red racing car, nuts, and chocolate?
– A Ferrari Rocher!

Why do milk chocolate truffles like sky diving?
– Because theyโ€™re dairy-ing!

My friend just told me he has a chocolate lab.
– Turns out it’s a dog, not a place. Bummer

What is a French catโ€™s favorite dessert?
– Chocolate mousse.

For their dessert, most French cats like the chocolate mousse.

What occasion do chocolate bars look forward to all month?
– PayDay!

Why did the hipster burn his mouth?
– Because he drank a tall hot chocolate mocha frappuccino with low-fat soy milk and cinnamon dolce sprinkles before it was cool!

I’ve started calling my girlfriend names like Custard, Ice cream, Pudding, Chocolate cake, or Apple pie.
– I’m planning to desert her.

What is the opposite of Chocolate?
– Chocoearly.

Why did the candy bar cross the road?
– Because he was choco-LATE for the bus!

What do you get when you donโ€™t give your dog chocolate?
– Chocolate bark and maybe even a choco-bite!

Why wouldnโ€™t the chocolate truffle answer anyoneโ€™s calls?
– He was desfondant!

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