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Chemistry jokes 🧪 in 2025

What Do You Do With a Sick Chemist?
– You try to helium, and then you try to curium, but if all else fails, you gotta barium.

H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
-Drinking.

What happens when spectroscopists are idle?
-They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.

What do you call a clown in jail?
-A Silicon!

Because of its high reactivity, the slogan
-If you can’t join ‘em, barium” was suggested.

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
-It went OK.

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
-It went OK!

What do you say when you run out of chemistry jokes?
-I should zinc of new ones.

What do you call a clown who’s in jail?
-A silicon.

Why should you go drinking with neutrons?
– Because wherever they go, there’s no charge!

How can you tell the chemist in the restroom?
-He washes his hands BEFORE he goes.

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
-He just couldn’t put it down.

Why can’t lawyers do NMR?
– Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.

What is the chemical formula for sea water?
-CH2O!

What is a chemist’s solution to times of hunger?
-Titrations.

Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

– Na

A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, “How much for a beer?
-The bartender gives him a smile and says, “For you, no charg

What did one acid say to the other?
-You’re overreacting.

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