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Chemistry jokes 🧪 in 2025

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
-A one molar solution.

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
-H2O cubed.

The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty, but how does the chemist see it?
-Completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

What did the chemist say when there was an explosion in the lab?
– Oxidants happen.

What did one titration say to the other?
-“Let’s meet at the endpoint.”

I want to write some jokes about the periodic table
-… But I don’t think I’ll be in my element.

What do you call a clown in prison?
-Silicon

What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
-CSI

What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?
– 2 Na

A one molar solution.
– … K

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
-OH SNaP!

Why can you never trust atoms?
-They make up everything!

Why is organic chemistry so hard?
– The subject has alkynes of trouble.

What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?
-Breaking up is hard to do.

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
-A one molar solution!

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
-(H2O)3.

What is the chemical formula for “coffee”?
– CoFe2

Why did the attacking army use acid?
-To neutralize the enemy’s base!

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