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Carrot jokes 🥕 in 2025

What was the snowman doing in the carrot section of the grocery store?
– Picking his nose

Did you hear about the carrot detective?
– He got to the root of every case.

A man goes to the doctor with a carrot up his nose.
He has a stalk of celery in the other nostril and peas in his ears. He says to the doctor, “Doc, I’m not feeling well.”
– The doctor says, “Well, you’re not eating right.”

You know Murphy’s Law. It’s “If something can go wrong, it will”, but do you know Cole’s law? It’s…
– shredded cabbage, mayonnaise, maybe some carrot.

The amount of cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrots divided by the volume of the mayo.
– That’s Cole’s Law.

Which vegetable betrayed Jesus?
– Judas Is-carrot

In the vegetable and fruit aisle
Me: Hi, are these carrots genetically modified?
Clerk: No, why do you ask?
– Carrot: Yeah, why do you ask?

Since pirates are on the water all the time, meat is scare and some are actually vegetarians.
– They are called Pirates of the Carrot Bean.

What is invisible and smells like Carrots?
– Bunny Farts!

how do you catch a rabbit?
– Hide behind a bush and make a noise like a carrot.

How can you make a soup rich?
– Add 14 carrots (carats) to it.

Cucumber, carrot, banana – none of them used for scale
A man walks into a doctor’s office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
“What’s the matter with me Doc?” he asks.
– The doctor replies, “You’re not eating properly!”

How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
– Because you never see rabbits wearing glasses

I couldn’t find the thingy that peels potatoes and carrots, so I asked my kids if they’d seen it.
– Apparently, she left me two days ago.

What did one snowman say to the other?
– Does it smell like carrots?

A man walks in to a green grocer’s
“Excuse me ma’am, are these carrots genetically modified?”
– “No” interrupted the carrot.

What’s invisible and smells like carrots?
– Rabbit farts.

What’s orange and never shuts up?
– A carrot reading the bible!

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