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Car Jokes 🚗 in 2025

What did the traffic light say to the car?
– Don’t look now. I’m changing.

That awkward moment when your checking yourself out in the window of a car
-and you realize there’s somebody inside

What is a musicians favorite car?
-Honda A Chord

What’s the difference between a three-wheeled car and the american economy?
-The car crashes less

A juggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police. “What are those knives doing in your car?” asked the officer. “I juggle them in my act.” “Oh yeah?” says the cop. “Let’s see you do it.”
-He needed a binary log.

Whats the difference between a cow and a car?
-I don’t have a car

What did the moderator say to kick off the IT speed dating session?
-“Singles, sign on!”

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather,
-but not like the other passengers in the car with him.

I was reversing my car in the garage and asked my son to spot me, and let me know when I hit the wall.
-I heard a bang.
“3:45 PM”, he said.

What ruined Tiger Woods’ golf career?
-His driving game.

What did Jenny get for her birthday after a car accident
-An amputation

Did you hear about the Trump terrorist who tried to blow up a car?
-He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe.

In order to get to the valves, a mechanic carefully removed the engine parts from a car while the car owner – a surgeon – looked on.
-Afterwards the mechanic said to the surgeon:
‘You know, I reckon my line of work is every bit as difficult and skilled as yours.’

‘Perhaps,’ said the surgeon, ‘But I’d like to see you do it while the engine is running.’

Frog car
– What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.

Apple is set to release their new electric smart car in 2024…
-It will be the first apple product with windows.

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted,
-but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

A young boy is listening to the radio in the car with his father. “Dad, what music did you like growing up?”
-I was a huge fan of Led Zeppelin,” the father replies.

“Who?” the son asks.

“Yeah,” the dad responds, “I liked them too.”

car service outrage
-I recently paid $300 for a limousine and I just found out the fee doesn’t include a driver.

I can’t believe I spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it.

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