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Candy jokes 🍭🍬🍫 in 2025

What’s a snowman’s favorite candy?
– Sno-Caps.

What kind of bear has no teeth?
– A gummy bear!

What do a pistol and candy have in common?
– When you pull them out of your backpack suddenly everyone at school wants to be your friend

I was once in love with this girl named Candy, but I couldn’t date her
– She was a total AirHead.

What candies do you find at school?
– Smarties, Nerds, and Dum-Dums!

What do you call a really good popsicle?
– Fantast-lick!

My local movie theater was robbed of almost $10,000.
– The thieves got away with three boxes of popcorn, two large sodas, three boxes of candy and a hotdog.

Whats Marcie’s favourite candy
– A Peppermint Patty

I remember when I was a kid, I could go to the store with $1 and come home with 3 bags of chips, 2 candy bars, 6 packs of now or laters, and an ice cold drink.
– Nowadays, they got cameras everywhere.

What does Bigfoot say when he ask for candy?
– Trick-or-feet

What two candies are the smartest?
– Smarties and Nerds.

A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it: Doctor: I have good news and bad news Guy” Whats the bad news Doc:
– They replaced your toe with a piece of candy Guy: Good news? Doc: You now have tic tac toe

What is Pennywise’s favorite candy?
– Sour Patch Kids

Successfully ran away from the cops today, after I stole a candy bar
– They tried their best, but I had too many Twix up my sleeve.

What’s the most popular sweet at the North Pole?
– Ice crispy treats.

What is a monkey’s favorite cookie?
– Chocolate chimp!

Music is like candy…
– It’s great once you get rid of the rapper.

A guy, desperate for a drink walks into a candy store. He looks around and after a while the storekeeper says, “Can I help you with anything?”
– The guy replies, “Yeah, I really need a drink! Got any liquor?
– “Well, I’m not sure but there is this here,” replies the storekeeper.
– “What is that?”
– “It’s liquor-ish”

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