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Candy jokes 🍭🍬🍫 in 2025

I was out driving on Halloween and I hit a cat, I think it was dressed like a cat. It could have been a piñata for all I know because there was candy everywhere.

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Somebody sprayed free candy on my van.
– The joke is on them, i have no candy.

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What happened to the man who only ate Skittles?
– He farted rainbows.

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What’s white, red and blue at Christmas time?
– A sad candy cane!

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A diet-conscious person couldn’t Reese-ist the candy which she had seen in the candy shop.

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Why do Scandinavian kids visit candy stores the most?
– Because it’s really Sweden there.

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Whenever I give my seat on the bus to an elderly person, they’re as happy as a kid in a candy store…
– I do the same in the men’s bathroom and they hobble away as fast as they can.

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Why did the Skittles go to school?
– They wanted to become Smarties!

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?
– Because he wanted sweet dreams!

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What do you get when you dip a kitten in chocolate?
– A Kitty Kat bar!

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What’s the most popular candy in Rwanda?
– Tutsi Roll

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I know a guy who collects candy canes
– They’re all in mint condition.

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What contry did candy come from?
– Sweetland or Candyland

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What does NASA call a dog standing on a Mars Bar?
– Rover

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Ending childhood obesity is easy.
– It’s as easy as taking candy from a baby.

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Oh no the apocalypse is here! I’ve already killed 12 zombies! How’s everyone else doing? Also one question.
– Does anyone know why they all have bags of candy?

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What’s a Rabbi’s favourite candy?
– Jew-jubes.

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What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
– A marsbar!

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