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Canada jokes in 2025

What do you call a Canadian slide? A polite decline!

Why did the Canadian bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!

What do you call a Canadian with a map? A ‘chart’eh’ member!

Why did the Canadian join a music band? He heard they were looking for more ‘eh’ flats!

Why don’t Canadians like knock-knock jokes? They always rush to open the door!

Why was the Canadian diet so successful? It was very a-pollogenic!

Why do Canadians always carry a pencil? In case they come across a sketchy situation!

How does a Canadian bee buzz? “Buzz, eh”!

Why do Canadian cows have bells? Because their horns don’t work!

What do you call a fast Canadian? A “speedy Gonzal-eh”!

Why don’t Canadians need a compass? They always follow the politeness north!

How do you know Santa is Canadian? He always says “ho, ho, eh”!

Why did the Canadian refuse to join the army? He didn’t want to start a conflict!

Why did the Canadian never play hide and seek with his money? Because it always hides in the ‘loonie’ places!

How do you know if a song is Canadian? It’s always in the key of ‘Eh’!

Why did the Canadian refuse to jump off the diving board? He didn’t want to make a splash!

Why was the Canadian book never finished? It always apologised for its plot holes!

How do you know if a film is Canadian? It ends with “Sorr-end”!

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