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Calculus Jokes ➗ in 2025

A 120-pound camera sits atop a tripod. How much force does each leg hold?
-Whoops. Meant to type 130. Forgot that the camera adds 10 pounds.

I knew calculus would kill me some day
-… I should have seen the warning sines.

What’s long, hard, and scary when you first see it?
-Calculus homework.

Two calculus professors are sitting in a bar.
– One says: “I am so disappointed in people nowadays. Hardly anyone understands calculus properly.”

Calculus has a steep learning curve…
– But at least you know exactly how steep the learning curve is!

What do you call a group of 8th grade boys arguing about calculus?
-Math debaters

My teacher took off points when I spilled my juice on my Calculus homework…
-… Apparently, I shouldn’t drink and derive.

If you want to pass your calculus exam, don’t sit in between two identical twins.
-It’s very hard to differentiate between them.

Why did Newton invent calculus?
-He wanted to test his limits.

What math is discussed between sea gulls?
-Integral Calculus (Inter-gull Calculus).

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