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Cactus jokes 🌵🌵 in 2024

Is there something wrong with your cactus?
– “Yes, but I can’t put my finger on it.”

What do you call a cactus on a plane?
– A cactus. It doesn’t matter where it is, it’s still a cactus!

Whenever a cactus goes for a job interview, they always wear a cactie.

A cactus once accidentally broke the favorite tub of another cactus. So the second cactus came to him and said, “Hey, I have a bone to prick with you.”

What do you call a rude cactus?
– A prick.

What do you call a lot of cactus?
– A cac-ton.

Where does the head of all the cacti keep his armies?
– In his sleevies.

The cactus who was turning 16, decided to throw a sweet 16 birthday party. Her friend said “I hope your birthday party planning is on point.”

The cactus needed something to cover his pointy ends before he went to the balloon festival. So he went and spiked a deal with the shopkeeper to give him something for a low price.

You’re cooler than a cactus in sunglasses.

Why didn’t the cactus have friends?
– He was a bit prickly.

The worst thing about dropping a cactus is catching it.

You can directly put colors on cacti. You just have to use a Sharpie.

On the occasion of New Years Eve, cacti wish everyone well by shouting, “Have a fancactus New Year.”

The cactus forgot his way back home when he decided to go on a solo adventure. He was in quite a prickle.

What should you say if you bump into a cactus?
– “Ouch!”

What did the happy cactus say to the grumpy cactus?
– Don’t be so prickly.

Whenever any cacti want to start a family they go to Plant Parenthood.

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