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Bug jokes ๐ŸฆŸ in 2025

I told my sister that I needed an insect to help me prove my innocence at court.
– She told me that I should use an Aphid David.

Why does every military base have very few insects?
– Military bases are no-fly zones.

What does an insect with a stinger say after a meal?
– It says, “that was beelicious”.

What do the bees brush their hair with?
– A honeycomb!

What is the most faithful insect?
– A flea, once they find someone they like they stick to them!

I went to an all insect restaurant, but their service was quite terrible.
– Apparently fly-tipping isn’t allowed.

There is a variety of bugs even smarter than talking parrots.
– They are the spelling bees.

What do you call the horns that are for insects?
– Ant-lers

Because they always know when your eating outside!

What did Bugs Bunny say after beaming aboard the Enterprise?
– What’s up Spock?

I decided to develop an exercise routine for insects. It’s not going that well.
– Guess I have to work out the bugs.

I saw some fireflies at a race this morning.
– The conductor started the race by yelling “Ready, Set, Glow!”.

Why was the centipede late for his office?
– Because he had to put on his shoes to go outside.

What did one flea say to the other after a night out?
– Shall we walk home or take a dog?

There was a new film out. It was about two insects who met in Italy.
– It was a Rome-ants film.

What do we call that one insect that bites during worship?
– We call them Mosque-itos.

What do you call a hybrid insect that doesnโ€™t talk to anyone?
– A mute-ant.

Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team?
– He took too long to put his boots on!

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