Brick jokes 🧱 in 2025

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable?
– A brick to the back of his head should do it.

A drug addict calls the police to report something interesting
The police officer, interested, asks. “What is it?”
The addict responds. “Okay, I-”
The officer interrupts, quickly making sure they’re not on drugs “You’re sober right now, right?”
“Yes, this happened when I was sober too.”
All seems okay to this point. “Okay, go on.”>
“I saw an Italian plumber bump his head on a brick and grow three times his size!”
The officer pauses for a moment and mumbles to himself. “It’s the mushrooms.”

Little Johnny is in class…
and his teacher says; ‘Whoever answers my question right, can go home’. Johnny takes a brick from his bag and throws it through the window. ‘Who did that?!?!’ the teacher yelled. ‘I did sir, can I go home now?’

The lion throws a huge birthday party. All the animals but one go. Which is it and why?
– The giraffe: he’s still in the refrigerator.

I don’t want to sound like I’m showing off or something, but people put bricks through my windows…
…just so they can hear me practicing my saxophone louder.

There was a father with three daughters…
– The first daughter came up to him and said, “Dad, why is my name daisy?”
He replies, “because when you were born a daisy fell on your head.”
The second daughter comes up to him and asks the same, “Dad, why is my name lily?”
“When you were born, a lily pad fell on your head.”
The third daughter walks up to him and says, “MAUUUNGUNNFFFAUUUUUUU!”
“Shut up Brick!”

Bricks have a frustrating sex life.
– They’re hard all the time, but only get laid once.

I had some ice cream recently that tasted of brick.
– Turned out it was Walls.

What’s the difference between bricks and incels?
– Bricks get laid

When I was in 2nd grade, my dog Brick was hit by a car and killed, and my mom tried to console me. She said, “He’s probably already in Heaven with God.”
– I said, “Why would God want a dead dog?”

These days my boss has been getting on my nerves. See I’m a brick layer and he is always yelling to layer the bricks faster and faster…
– These days everyone wants instant stratification.

What’s the difference between the Thalmor and a brick?
– A brick will actually help rebuild Skyrim

My history textbook says that the Pharaoh of Egypt used slaves to build the pyramids.

There were 3 brothers: Little Snowflake, Little Leaf, and Little Brick…
So one day Little Snowflake goes up to his mum and asks her:
– Why am I called like this?
– Because when you were born, a Snowflake fell on your forehead
So Lil’ Snowie all excited goes up to his brothers and tells them that they should ask what about their names, so Little Leaf goes up to his dad and asks him:
– Why am I called like this?
– Because when you were born a leaf from a tree fell on your forehead
So it’s Lil’ Brickie’s turn and he goes up to his dad and asks him:
– Did you know that vaccines have microchips in them so the government can control us?

What’s the difference between a brick salesperson and a boxer
– One stocks rocks and the other rocks socks

We all know what’s red and bad for your teeth (a brick). But what is blue and really bad for your teeth?
– A really fast brick.

An ugly son asks his Dad Why is my sister named Rose?
Dad: Because when she was coming out of the hospital, a rose fell from the sky and landed on her forehead.
US: Same for Penny?
Dad: Yup. A penny just fell onto her little head.
Son: Thanks dad.
Dad: No problem, Brick.

Sally swims across an alligator infested river and doesn’t get eaten. How?
– The alligators are at the lion’s birthday party.