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Bread jokes 🍞🥖🥯 in 2025

Q: Why does everyone need bread and water?
– A: Loaf makes the world go round.

Why was the loaf of bread upset?
– His plans kept going a rye.

What did one bread slice say to the other bread slice when they saw butter on the table?
– Uh oh! We are toast.

How do you say hello to German bread?
– Gluten tag.

Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
– He told her she was being too kneady.

Q: Why did bread break up with margarine?
– A: For a butter lover.

That sour loaf kneads to be punished.

Why was the baker in a bad mood?
– He woke up on the wrong side of the bread.

Did you hear about the baker’s lorry that spilled its load on the motorway?
– Police say to expect delays on the yeast- bound carriageway.

What did mama bread say to her kids?
– It’s way past your breadtime!

Q: How does a loaf of bread validate it’s anger against grapes?
– A: Raisining!

The flour got in trouble, so his mama sent him to bread early.

What did the muffin say to the crumpet?
– You deserve butter than this.

Last week I saw a loaf in a cage at my local zoo – it was bread in captivity.

Q: What does bread do after it’s done baking?
– A: Loaf around.

What did a slice of bread say after brushing his teeth?
– I’m bready for bed.

Why was the bread maker fired from his job?
– He was loafing around too much.

How does bread remember things?
– It uses Toast-It notes.

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