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Boat jokes ⛵ in 2025

Which type of vegetable is banned on ships?
– Leeks!

I recently started a boat shop in my attic
– The sails have been going though the roof.

Why did the viking buy an old boat ?
– He couldn’t a fjord a new one

Why could not the sailors play the game of cards?
– Because the captain was standing on the deck.

What ship is most like by all the vampires?
– Blood vessel.

How many boaters does it take to change a lightbulb?
– None, because the right size bulb isn’t on board, the local marine-supply store
doesn’t carry that brand, and the mail-order house has them on back-order.

What’s the difference between a homeless man and a boat captain?
– One has a boat.

What kind of vegetable is not allowed on ships?
– Leeks.

How were the goods transported through the ship?
– With the help of car-go.

Having yachts of fun!

Where do zombies like to go sailing?
– The Dead Sea.

Why do Norwegian boats have barcodes on them? (Old but gold)
– To Scandinavyin

What is the name of the boat that is famous among people?
– Relation-ship.

What did the captain tell the passengers on the boat?
– “It’s going to be a cruizy ride!”

A dentist opened an office on a boat. What was the boat’s name?
– The Tooth Ferry

Boating sounds like a terrible idea on paper
– But it’s a thousand times better on water.

If you ever look up and see a boat….
– you’re probably drowning.

Why were the ship owners so sad about buying the new ship?
– Because it coasta-plenty to them!

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