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Boat jokes ⛵ in 2025

Have you heard about the Bluetooth iceberg?
– Any ship that goes near it will sync.

Why do people refer to boats as “she”
– Because they’re full of seamen.

What was the discount rate at the boat store?
– A two-for-one sail.

How many sailors does it take to change a lightbulb?
– None, because there is no right size available onboard, and the marine store doesn’t carry that brand, and moreover, the mail-order has them on back-order

Let’s fish upon a star.

I bought a sail for my boat on Amazon the other day. Today it dawned on me that it’s not the right size so I called to cancel. They said it’s too late.
– That sail has shipped.

Why is every ship, boat or raft being considered a she and why are they named female names?
– Because it takes a lot of effort to make them look good.

What happened when the boat carrying red paint crashed against the boat carrying blue paint?
– The crew got marooned.

What is the name of the most joyful ship?
– The laughter-ship.

What causes some boats to become party boats?
– Pier pressure.

What is the favorite boat of a sailor who really values the people in his life?
– The friend ship

What is a cats favorite boat?
– A catamaran.

Where do the most deadly creatures like zombies go for sailing?
– To the Dead Sea.

Yeah, buoy, let’s sail!

When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat?
– When there’s a sail on it.

Joke I wrote on a boat at age 6:
What do you tell a police officer when they get on your boat?
– Police put on your life-vest!

Why did the students go on the boat?
– To get their scholar-ship!

How much did it cost a pirate for the piercing of his ear?
– A buck an ear.

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