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Boat jokes ⛵ in 2025

What is the name of the boat made of stones?
– A hard-ship.

What activity do zombies like to do on a cruise ship?
– They like to shuffle-board!

One ship carrying blue paint collided with another ship carrying red paint.
– The crew is missing and believed to be marooned.

Why did the ‘Friends’ boat team make Courtney Cox?
– Because Lisa Kudrow.

My wife asked me why I’m always on the boat and I don’t spend time with her?
– I told her she may be old but she is always wet and ready to go. And if anything goes wrong I can get rid of her for a new one.
– Lastly, if we get crabs together it’s a good thing.

Where do the sick boats go for checkups?
– To the doc.

Which movie do sailors like to watch the most?
– The Codfather.

What’s up dock?

Why did the sailing instructor jump into the water?
– She wanted to test the water!

My Devil worshipping brother just got a new row boat…
– He christened it Sail Hatin’

How do you get a good deal on the boat?
– When there is a sail on it.

Why was ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ not allowed to play on the cruise?
– Because of censor-ship!

What do you do with a sick boat?
– Take it to the doc.

What do you call it when one boat follows another boat too closely?
– Sailgating

Did you know some vegetables are nevee transported by sea?
– Because having a leek in the boat would be very bad.

Why did the sailor suddenly jump into the sea?
– To test the water.

What was the sailor worried about this time?
– To not go overboard.

What did Gotye say after he sold his boat?
– Now you’re just a boat that I used to row.

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