Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Beer Jokes 🍺 in 2024

For those “I hate everyone” days.
-Wish you were beer.

Apparently, drinking a pint of beer shortens your lifespan by nine minutes.
-According to my calculations I died some time in 1829.

Why do frogs taste similar to beer?
-Because of the hops.

What is the definition of a balanced diet?
-A beer in each hand.

A great joke about the vitalness of beer
-Vitamin B? You mean beer?

I don’t have a beer gut.
-I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs

Every time I have a beer, my wife keeps nagging me and telling me I drink too much
-I mean come on, who needs to hear that nine times a day?

In heaven there is no beer,
-which is why we drink it here.

A man walks in a bar and shouts “free beers outside!” So everyone in the bar, except the bartender, ran outside in excitement.
-The bartender, visibly angry, yells at the man “what the hell did you do that for? Now i have no customers!!”
The man says “Sorry mister, i honestly didnt fink any of those men would be brave enough to fight a grizzly beer, let alone free of them”

One day a father went out for some cold beer and threw the 18 pack in the back seat on top of the infant in the car seat
-Fortunately it was light beer.

A hilarious pun about beer quantity.
-Take a pitcher. It’ll last longer.

What does a burnt pizza, a pregnant woman, and a frozen beer have in common
– Somewhere along the line someone forgot to pull it out

Wife: *points to my empty beer glass* Want another one? Me: Sure, thanks
-Wife: *hands me her empty beer glass* Bring one for me too

How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
-He buys two cases of beer.

That’s all the justification I needed.
-I don’t drink beer. I drink a wheat smoothie.

Ohio man forgoes food for 46 day “Beer Diet”…
-…Florida Man…it appears you have competition.

How did Moses make beer?
-Hebrew-ed it.

Beer.
– Because you can’t drink bacon.

Follow us on Facebook