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Beer Jokes 🍺 in 2024

A mushroom walked into a pub. He asked the bartender to give him a beer
-The bartender said, “I can’t, you’ll get too rowdy.” The mushroom then said, “Oh come on! When I drink, I’m a fun guy!”

You look forward to it all day, then it’s just gone and you could cry.
-Spilling a beer is the equivalent of losing a balloon.

What’s the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
-Beer nuts are about a buck fifty and deer nuts are under a buck.

If coronavirus isn’t about beer…
– why do I keep seeing cases of it?

What do you never say to a policeman?
-Sure let me grab my license. Can you hold my beer?

I NEED this bottle opener!
-Go ahead. Take your top off.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.
– You know, music can really take you places,” he muses to the bartender. “For example, if you guys play one more rap song in here it’s going to take me to the next bar.

Beer is made from hops.
– Hops is a plant. Beer=salad.

What’s the difference between Trump and a can of beer?
-At least the beer has proof.

A funny joke about the stereotypical male.
– How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

What’s a vampire’s favorite beer?
-*Bloodw*eiser

This beer tastes like
-I’m not going to work tomorrow.

Skinny doesn’t feel anywhere as good as drinking a good beer.
-Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels … Except beer, that tastes like skinny can go to hell.

I poured root beer into a squared glass
-Now I just have a beer.

To beer or not to beer,
-that is the question.

Saw in the new year with some Australian kangaroo beer
-Nice and hoppy

Why doesn’t Jesus buy beer?
– Hebrews.

A funny joke about a great pairing! *wink, wink*
-“Beer … Because you can’t drink bacon!

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