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Beard jokes 🧔 in 2025

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a philosopher? A beard-thinker.

Why did the bearded man refuse to shave his beard for the winter? He said it kept his face warm.

Why did the bearded man go to the comedy club? He wanted to see if he could get a beard belly laugh.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a sailor? A sea-captain with a chin curtain.

What do you call a bearded pirate? Blackbeard.

Why did the bearded man go to the barbershop on Halloween? To get a beard trimmer.

Why did the bearded man go to the circus? To see the bearded elephants.

Why did the bearded man get a tattoo of a razor on his neck? So he could always have a close shave.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a mechanic? A grease-stache.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a scientist? A beaker-beard.

Why did the bearded man refuse to shave his beard on vacation? He said it was his travel companion.

Why did the barber have a hard time shaving the bearded man? He kept getting lost in the beard.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a writer? A beard-writer.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a magician? A hocus-focus on the goatee.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a poet? A bard-beard.

Why did the bearded man go to the park? To have a picnic with his beard buddies.

Why did the bearded man refuse to shave his beard? He said it was his face blanket.

What do you call a bearded man who’s also a chef? A kitchen king of the whisker.

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