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Bartender jokes 🍹🍸 in 2025
Bartenders work in bars and at many special events and working with both alcohol and the people who are ordering from them, they learn many people skills. Some of those that are being served are the most likely to use bartender jokes, either to try and impress bartenders or friends.
Guy runs into a bar, yells “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
– Bartender says “Three feet tall.”
Guy says “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
A sexual predator, a racist and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
– The bartender says “What can I get you Mr. President?”
2 blondes, 2 brunettes, and 2 redheads walk into a bar. The 2 blondes say “hello” to the bartender…
– The 4 Non Blondes say “WHAT’S GOING ON!”
The drunk on the next stool turn angrily and says “Be careful. You are speaking about the woman I love.”
– “What can I get you Senators?”
ƒ(x) walks into a bar. The bartender says,
– “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.”
A guy walks into a bar and sees a bunch of meat hanging on the wall.
– He sits down and asks the bartender what the deal is with the meat. Bartender says the deal is if you want a free drink you gotta jump up and touch the meat but if you miss, you buy a round for the bar. The guy takes another look at the meat and the bartender asks if he’s in. No, says the guy the steaks are too high.
A guy walks into a bar, slumps into a chair, and orders a beer. The bartender says, “What’s wrong, pal? You look down.”
– The guy sighs and says, “I am down. My wife is mad at me, and said she wouldn’t talk to me for a whole month.”
The bartender says, “Gee, that’s too bad. When does that start?”
“Start? Today’s the last day.”
what kind of drink does the genie bartender serve?
– a djinn and tonic
A man comes home with a bouquet of flowers for his wife. “What, do you expect me to spread my legs now?”
– says the wife. The husband responds, “Honey, I love you, but I think a vase will work just fine.”
A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm.
– He asks for one beer, and one for the road.
So a guy walks into a bar and orders a pint of less.
– The bartender asks, “What’s less?” The guy says “I don’t know but the doctor told me I have to start drinking it.”
The bartender says “No time travelers allowed in this bar”
– Two time travelers walk into a bar
A drunk in a bar is unloading on the bartender.
– “For 20 long and wonderful years,” mused the gent at the bar, “my wife and I were deliriously happy.”
A bartender says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here.”
– A time traveler walks in a bar…
Bill pulled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced…
– My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!
What makes you say that? the bartender inquired.
Last week, Bill explained, I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have me around that every time the milkman or mailman came by, she’d run down the driveway waving her arms and hollering, ‘My husband’s home! My husband’s home!’
A man walks in a bar and shouts free beers outside! So everyone in the bar, except the bartender, ran outside in excitement.
– The bartender, visibly angry, yells at the man what the hell did you do that for? Now i have no customers!!
The man says Sorry mister, i honestly didnt fink any of those men would be brave enough to fight a grizzly beer, let alone free of them
The bartender yelled at me when I left my stool at the bar.
– “Why did you even bring this in here?!?” he cried.
A dog limps into a bar
– The bartender says “What can I get you?” The dog says “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”
Most Popular Categories
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Mixing Drinks
Top bartender jokes are often about the way that they mix drinks, and how they spend so much of their time serving drinks to others. While they do mix many drinks, each bartender is different in how they balance the tasks, how many they can make at a time, and how much they include in each. A well made drink will have the perfect balance of each ingredient and will have a pleasant taste without a burn. Hilarious bartender jokes about how they make drinks are second only to cheesy bartender jokes about how they interact with people.While making drinks should be the focus of the job, interacting with customers and ensuring they are happy is perhaps the most important part of the job. Corny bartender jokes about them working double duty and serving as a therapist are some of the most popular. It is a common stereotype that when people go into bars and drink to feel better or to spend the evening, they are also going to share all of their problems with the bartender on duty. Short bartender jokes will address this often, and while it may be true in some cases it is not in all, but one liner bartending jokes will get a laugh anyway. They are enjoyable and fun, and do not target the bartenders as the joke, but the way in which people naturally trust them even though they may be strangers and share their innermost thoughts and worries with them.
Bartenders in the Movies
Fancy drinks, throwing around bottles, and tricks behind the bar are often seen in movies, especially those that are about bars and the people who work in and frequent them. Funny bartender jokes about their talent and how they can do anything are common and can show a respect for the job and for those who do it. While many people would be unable to complete those tasks or tricks, there are many who cannot, and top bartender jokes are enjoyed by all of them and may address those who can do bartending tricks and those who cannot.In movies bartenders are most often attractive, either men or women, who are cool and brave, and attract a wide range of attention. One liner bartender jokes that address the attractiveness of these bartenders, and the stereotype that those in every bar outside of the entertainment industry will be attractive as well, are very popular in college towns and with young adults. Short bartender jokes often assume that people operate on this basic assumption and will find the joke amusing because of it, without including all of the details.
Cute bartender jokes are fun, and they are a great way to share a laugh with friends for adults, however bartender jokes are not for kids. Though they do not attend bars, they will see bartenders at weddings and other events, and have a basic understanding of the profession, but they do have many of their own jokes about them.