Most Popular Categories

All Categories

Bank jokes 🏦💰🏧 in 2024

What would you call a man that had a head full of change?
– He’d probably be called Headquarters.

So our local sperm bank got shut down
– Turns out it was just some old pervert who set up a glory hole.

What did the tree do when the bank closed?
– Started its own branch.
Always borrow money from a pessimist,
He won’t expect it back.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
– He wanted cold hard cash!

Why is money also called dough?
– Well, because every person kneads it.

What kind of car does a sushi chef who makes a huge amount of money drive?
– A Rolls-Rice.

What did the comedian say when he walked into a bank?
– This is a stand-up.

I won $3 million on the lottery this weekend so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75.

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

Where does Dracula store his money?
– Probably in the blood bank.

I lost my job at the bank on my first day.
– A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

My dad always said to me, “Work until your bank account looks like a phone number” so I did.
– Account balance: $9.11.

I am going to qualify for free shipping no matter how much it costs.

Why wasn’t the dead woman living well?
– It’s because she was dead broke.

What comes with a tail and a head but it’s not an animal?
– It’s a penny.

A man who had lost his leg in the war needed to visit the bank
“What do you need?” Said the Banker.

“I need to check my balance.” Said the man

Why did the banker die?
– He cashed out.
Sign above bank teller’s station: “To err is human,
to forgive is not bank policy.”

If you want to get rich, why should you keep your mouth shut?
– Because silence is golden.

Follow us on Facebook