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Baby Jokes 👶 in 2024

How did the baby know she was ready to be born?
-She was running out of womb.

My baby just ate a bunch of scrabble tiles.
-The next diaper change could spell disaster.

Tell me, does the stork deliver babies with their diapers on?
-No, they’re stork naked!

Why do we dress babies in onesies?
-Because they can’t dress themselves.

Do I have to have a baby shower?
-Not if you change the baby’s diaper quickly.

Do you know what a baby computer calls his old man?
-Data!

What do you call a group of baby garbage bins?
-A litter.

Why did the baby crawl across the street?
-He saw the one object you told him he couldn’t play with.

What’s the difference between a baby and a salad?
-Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.

Why was the baby drop of ink crying?
-His mom was in the pen, and he didn’t know how long her sentence was.

Why did the infant go on a diet?
-She wanted to lose her baby fat.

How did the baby tell her mom she had a wet diaper?
-She sent her a pee-mail.

What social media site is for babies who want to go on playdates?
-Tindergarden

Who held the baby octopus for ransom?
– Squidnappers.

How many babies do you need to paint a wall?
-Depends on how hard you throw them.

How did it work out for the lady who had a sea section?
-She gave birth to a bouncing baby buoy.

How do you get an astronaut’s baby to sleep?
-You rocket.

Why did the baby cry at 1 a.m., 3 a.m., and 5 a.m.?
-Why not?

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