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Baby Jokes 👶 in 2024

Mom: “Why is there a strange baby in the crib?”
-Dad: “You told me to change the baby.”

What did Frosty the Snowman and his partner put over their baby’s crib?
-A snowmobile!

What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying ten babies in one trashcan.
-Morbid humor would be saying one baby in ten trashcans

What did Baby corn say to Mama corn?
-“Where is Pop corn?”

Never trust a baby with a dirty diaper.
-They’re full of shit.

What social media app helps babies fall asleep by playing long-winded, monotonous conversations?
– Napchat

I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
-With any luck, right after she finishes college.

Why did the baby monster ask his father to stand in the freezer?
-Because he wanted a frozen pop!

What’s a breastfeeding baby’s least favorite holiday?
-Hall-o-wean.

Who’s bigger? Mrs. Bigger, Mr. Bigger, or their baby?
-Their baby because he’s a little Bigger.

Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
-Dayscare centers.

What goes 100mph and bounces up and down?
– A baby tied to the back of a truck.

I think the hospital accidentally switched our babies at birth…
-They’re identical twins, so it’s hard to be sure.

If a baby refuses to go to sleep…
-Is she resisting arrest?

My partner is so negative… I remembered the car seat, the stroller, AND the diaper bag…
-But all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.

Where can babies post status updates about how they‘re feeling?
-Babyfacebook

How should you treat a baby goat?
-Like a kid.

What do baby pythons play with?
-Rattlesnakes.

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