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Avocado jokes 🥑 in 2025

How do you make an avocado tactical?
– You turn it into GuacaMOLLE

With Avocado’s Constant.

I got a promotion in my job at the avocado farm. It was a move in the ripe direction.

What is an avocado’s favourite type of guitar?
– Guac-oustic.

What did the guacamole say to the astronaut?
– You’re avocado this world

Avocadoblue

What did the daddy avocado say to the baby avocado?
– You’re a chip off the guac.

What type of events do avocados go to when they want to find love?
– Seed dating.

How do you get a bunch of avocados into an Aerosmith concert?
– You tell them to GUAC This Way!

Ricardo the Avocado

What do you get if you cross an avocado with a horrible insect?
– A guac-roach.

Why are avocados the most self-conscious fruit?
– Because they’re full of fat

What do you call it when someone hits avocados repeatedly with a hammer?
– Gu-whack-a-mole-e.

My chemistry class had a party

You can’t judge any avocado until you guac-a-mile in his shoes.

What is an avocado’s favourite place to go on a date?
– The guac-tail bar.

What do you call an avocado that has had one hundred girlfriends?
– An avocad-ho

Bruh Cado

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