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Atom jokes ⚛ in 2025

Even after repeated search attempts, the atom couldn’t find its lost electron…
Yet, on the brighter side, it remained positive.

Scientists record the sound of two helium atoms laughing.
– HeHe.

Did you hear about the atom that was caught stealing electrons?
He was arrested and charged.

…this is the stuff I come up with while procrastinating studying for finals.

What do you call a nitrogen atom having a 5-way orgy with 4 other hydrogen atoms?
– Ammoooaaanium

Two atoms sitting in a bar..
One says I lost an electron. The other asks are you sure ?

Yeah I’m positive

What is it called when the electrons of one atom are transferred to another?
– Ionestly don’t know the answer.

A helium atom walks into a bar

The bartender says, “We don’t serve noble gases here.”

The helium atom does not react.

We learned about the orbitals of an atom today…
It was pretty Bohring.
.
.
.

I’ll let myself out.

Two atoms go on a date…when suddenly, one of them drops an electron and gasps. The other atom asks…are you sure?
– I’m positive! Replies the other atom.

Joke my scinence teacher dropped on us
A lithium atom walked into a bar and said

“Hey I think I left some electrons in here last night, have you seen any?”

The bar tender replied, “No, are you sure you lost them?”

The lithium atom replied “Yes I’m positive…”

You’d think that when two atoms in a salt bond, they’re being kind by sharing electrons, but actually, one atom is stealing the electron from the other.
Isn’t it ionic?

A human losing weight is like an atom losing electrons
– Everything is positive after that.

Why did the phosphorus atom go to the fortune teller?
– To find out his phos-fate!

Atoms are liars.
– They make up everything.

A sodium atom undergoes a vigorous reaction with flourine…
How do you feel?” Asks the fluoride ion.

“Positively shell shocked” the sodium ion replied.

How do we know that atoms are Catholic?
– Because they have mass.

An atom asks another atom,
Do these protons make my mass look big?

39 digits of pi accurately calculates the circumference of the universe to the width of a hydrogen atom
– Scientists still can’t determine how much is needed for your mother though

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