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Atom jokes ⚛ in 2025

you stole my electron
atom 1: you stole my electron.

atom 2: sure?

atom 1: positive!

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My friends tried to convince me I was a chemical element with the atomic number 82.
– Thankfully, I’m not so easily lead.

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What did one atom say to the other?
Thank you for your help in this matter!

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What did the chlorine atom say to the sodium atom?
– I’ve got my ion you.

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One atom bumped into another atom,
And said, “hey I just lost an electron!”

“Are you sure?” Asks the other atom.

“Yes, I’m positive!”

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Two atoms are walking down the street and they run into each other.
One says to the other, “Are you all right?”

“No, I lost an electron.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m positive.”

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Lose an electron?
– Gotta keep an ion it.

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A chemist walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Tonight all drinks are on me!”

The bartender says to him, “You must’ve had a good day today, what happened?”

“I finally found a way to make a stable molecule from a barium atom, two sodium atoms, and a sulfur atom!” the chemist proudly replies.

“Wow,” says the bartender, “That’s BaNaNaS!”

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An atom loses an electron…
– It says, “man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”

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A Hydrogen atom suddenly exclaimed: “I think I just lost my electron!”
“Are you sure?” Asked its friend,
“Yes” replied the first, “I’m positive.”

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Why did the atoms cross the road?
– It was time to split.

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Two atoms walk into a bar.

One says to the other, “Dang, I left my electrons in the car.”
The other replies, “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m positive.”

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So an atom walks into a bar…
He says, “Hey bartender, I think I lost an electron.” The bartender asks him if he’s sure, and he says , “Yeah, I’m positive.”

A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much for a beer. The bartender says, “For you, no charge.”

A photon walks into a bar. He sees his friend on the other side of the room, so he waves.

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Why did the atom not laugh at his friend’s joke?
– It was no laughing matter…

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If your atoms had no kinect energy you’d be 0K.

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Two atoms walking down the street …
… one turns to the other and says “I think I’ve lost an electron”. The other replies “F*ck me, a talking atom!”

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My friends tried to convince me I was a chemical element with the atomic number 102.
– But I told them No.

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Two atoms are walking down the street…
Two atoms are walking down the street together. The first atom turns and says, “Hey, you just stole an electron from me!”

“Are you sure?” asks the second atom.

To which the first atom replies, “Yeah, I’m positive!”

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