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Anniversary jokes 💝🥂 in 2025

My wife was hinting at what she wanted for our anniversary. She said, “I want something shiny that goes from 0-100 in 3 seconds.”
– I got her a weighing scale.

Anytime I have an anniversary, birthday or holiday I am reminded of the biggest joke of all
– My life

What did the man do when his wife said, “For our 25th wedding anniversary, I want a big ring”?
– He took her to a boxing match.

Happy anniversary to the love of my life.
– And her husband Bill.

A husband wanted to surprise his wife on their anniversary by putting a little bow tie on his manhood, but got worried she wouldn’t notice it after she turned out the lights.
– She found it touching.

The jewelry box I gave to my geologist wife for our wedding anniversary held sedimental value.

I handed my wife a picture of a $50,000 Birkin designer handbag. “This is what I’m getting you for our anniversary!” She was so happy she started crying.
– Who knew a simple photograph would mean so much to her?

Son: “Hey Dad, Happy 25th Anniversary. Jeez! Almost all my friend’s parents are divorced. What did you have to do to stay married for this long?”
– Dad: “Keep mum.”

How can a wife get her husband to do something?
– By proposing the new activity to him.

I bought my girlfriend a fridge for our anniversary.
– I know it wasn’t a great gift, but I loved seeing her face light up when she opened it.

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?”“Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”

This year was the 18th anniversary of 9/11.
– Now 9/11 is finally old enough to die for its country.

This year is my wool anniversary so I got my wife dryer balls.
– After seeing the gift she told me she got me blue ones

For our anniversary, I gave my girlfriend a small picture of me inside a pistachio.
– But that’s just me in a nutshell.

Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments of silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 200 chickens, countless carnations, delphiniums, lilies and roses who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.

How did the spiny mammal couple celebrate their anniversary?
– They gave each other a hedge-hug.

My girlfriend is in a band, and for our anniversary I bought her a new drum kit.
– It was a cymbal of my love.

I took my wife skating for our anniversary today
– Which sounds a lot better than I lost control of the car on the ice and she died

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