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Alligator jokes 🐊 in 2025

What do you call an alligator who loves watering his plants?
– An irrigator.

What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
– An Alley-gator.

What do you call a alligator without any legs
– Anything you want, it can’t run after you

What’s green and bad for your eyes?
– An alligator.

How does an alligator taste?
– With it’s mouth just like you do!

I get a rash when I wear polo shirts with little crocodiles on them.
– I am lacoste intolerant.

How about the stylish female crocodile, she’s every inch a frock-o-dile.

What is it called when an alligator cannot get hard?
– Ereptile dysfunction

If two alligators have reach an agreement…
… do they have a crocodeal?

Who gives alligators their Christmas presents?
– Santa Jaws

What’s the most popular basketball move among gators?
– The Alli-oop

Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
– It was a crocadoodledoo.

A blonde walks into a shop and wants a pair of alligator boots.
– The shopkeeper tells her they do not sell expensive items to blondes.

After becoming very frustrated with the shopkeepers attitude the blonde declares. FINE ILL JUST GO CATCH AN ALLIGATOR AND GET MY OWN BOOTS!

The shopkeeper replied why don’t you just try young lady with a smirk.
r>So the blonde heads out to the swamp absolutely determined to catch an alligator. Later in the day the shopkeeper drives by and noticed the Young lady waist deep in water with a shotgun in her hands.

He stops and watches as a very large alligator swims right at her. With lighting fast reflexes she throws the gun up and shoots the alligator killing it instantly.

He keeps watching as she drags the alligator to a pile of 6 or 7 more. As he rolls down the window to ask why she needs so many Gators for one pair of boots she rolls it over and shouts.

AHHHH THIS ONES BAREFOOT TOOO!

How do you fit an alligator in a Safeway bag?
– You take the ‘s’ out of ‘safe’, and you take the ‘f’ out of ‘way’

What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
– Croc-amole.

What do you call an alligator that is always stirring up trouble?
– An instigator.

What is the difference between a croc and a noisy dog?
– One has a bite worse than his bark.

What do you call a mix between a pig and an alligator…
– A baconator

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