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Alligator jokes 🐊 in 2025

What do you call an alligator with compass?
– A Navi-gator.

What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
– Goes to a re-tail store.

Billy Bob parked his rig in Florida for a few days before driving back home. He was about to dive into the surf but figured he’d better check out the alligator situation with the townsfolk. “Nope, no gators here,” a local as- sured him.
Billv Bob had swum out 50 led before his
brain kicked in again. “Hey. how come there
ain’t no gators in here?” he yelled back to the
guy onshore.
“Because they’re afraid of the sharks,” came
the reply.

An alligator asked an electric eel, “hey, can I touch you?”
– Electric eel: Yes, but I’d have to charge you.

Why did the alligator cross the road?
– It was going after the chicken.

What’s worse than a big, hungry alligator chasing you?
– Two big, hungry alligators chasing you.

What kind of crocodilian works in a sandwich shop?
– A deli-gator.

What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
– A congregator.

Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
– It may come back to bite you in the butt
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.

There are 3000 bricks on a plane
One of them falls out – how many are left?
*2999*

How do you put an elephant in the fridge in three steps?
*Open the door, put the elephant in, close the door*

An alligator is throwing a party and all the animals turn up except one – which one?
*The elephant, he’s still in the fridge*

How do you put a giraffe in the fridge in four steps?
*Open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, close the door*

Sally is trying to cross a lake guarded by an alligator. She manages to get across without dying – how?
*The alligator is at the party*

Sally dies anyway. She gets hit on the head by a flying brick

What do you call an alligator that always starts fights?
– An instigator!

What looks like half an alligator?
– The other half.

I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
– It was an alligrator.

The weather’s getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.

Earlier today I read that an alligator can grow up to 15 feet…
…but I’ve never seen one with more than 4.

Why don’t alligators like fast food?
– It’s too hard to catch.

Why should you never ever play texas hold’em with a crocodile?
– You will literally lose every hand.

A guy walks into a bar with his pet alligator
He says to the bartender, “Do you serve lawyers here?”

Bartender says, “Yep, sure do!”

The guy says, “Great! I’ll have a scotch neat, and my alligator will have a lawyer.”

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